I met this recent law school grad on okcupid and then we also connected later on tinder and the ball started rolling with our conversation.
We had a sushi dinner and I really loved how much he had traveled the world. He was also ex military, and I respect that a lot.
After dinner, we were having such fun conversation, we decided to have a drink at the bar next door too. I asked him there who the little baby girl in his pictures were. His niece?
Nope. That’s his daughter. Huh….could’ve mentioned that by now dude.
The night continued and he asked if it was ok to kiss me goodnight. Wow I thought. Someone is asking permission to touch me, this i new. The kiss was so polite and gentle, my initial reaction was that it was weird. But then I realized, that is the abuse leaking over into my thought process of how people should treat each other. Fuck.
We hung out two more times that week. Dave and busters, korean BBQ. Such fun dates. He kissed me in public. That was new. I forgot that that is also NOT a weird thing to do. Or to hold hands. Oof…. I am so skewed still, damint.
Some weird things came to light though over the dates. Like that he was still married and still getting through the divorce. That he’d been separated since August but it might be another year till the divorce goes through.
On our third date, his sister and her boyfriend joined us. They were so lovely. I actually liked him even more after having dinner with them all because I was like- OH so he isn’t weird. They are totally normal, she just got her Phd and he’s a bartender at an amazing place. It made me think, you know maybe this lawyer just got caught in some bad circumstances.
Me and him stayed for one more glass of wine after dinner and I said Happy Father’s Day to him. He said- Oh well yea it’s too bad though because I didn’t get to see my children today actually.
Children? As in plural. Oh right- yea he didn’t want to scare me off he says so he didn’t bring up his other TWO children. Two boys 8 and 9. So he has a baby girl AND two children. And he only gets to see them once a month. Huh….
I was really unsure about seeing him again. When he asked me to go to the Shakespeare Tavern though, I was like DAMN yes please. I’ve nbere been taken there! By the time my work day was over though, we were both running late and we missed the beginning of the show and just decided to grab dinner instead.
Turns out his job he had started and was only three days into already laid him off that afternoon. Because he failed his criminal background check!
Whaaaaaat? And he doesn’t go into what it was! So I finally blurted out- ummm are you going to share what criminal or arrest history you have with me, or what? It wasn’t THAT bad but like STILL…Possession of marijuana when he was 18.
Later on too, he tells me his lawyer has advised him that we don’t date. That he can’t get into a relationship. That it can be used against him. But that he still wants to hang out. I’m just like at this point…..so. many. red. flags.
He ends up getting really hammered that night. Doing multiple shots that I didn’t join him on. Who does shots alone?
I’m trying to wane my way off answering his texts but turns out he left his gucci sunglasses in my car. Oof. He’s so handsome too. It’s such a shame.